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Cool mustache, Wario
Try messing with the mad monk, you'll be sorry-oh
How many dictators does it take
To turn an empire into a union of ruinous states?
It's a disgrace what you did to your own people
Yo daddy beat you like a dog and now you're evil
You're from Georgia, sweet Georgia, and history books unfold ya
As a messed up motherfucker bent in the mind
You built a superpower but it paid the price
With the endless destruction of Russian lives
if you're the man of steel, I spit kryptonite!
Big dick mystic, known to hypnotize
I can end you with a whisper to your wife!

Look into my eyes, you perverted witch
See the soul of the man who made Mother Russia his bitch!
You think I give a fuck about my wife?
My own son got locked up in prison, and I didn't save his life!
You got off easy when they pickled that moose cock?
I'll leave your neck in a noose in a trench and shot
Your whole family, shot!
All your wizard friends, shot!
Anyone who sold you pierogi, shot!
Starve you for days till you waste away
I even crushed motherfuckers when I'm laid in state
Pride of Lenin took Trotsky out of the picture
Jumped a hammer on you harder than I bitch-slapped Hitler

I have no pride for you
Who ruined everything my revolution was doing
To stop the Bourgeoisie
I fought the bondage of classes, the proletarian masses
And brought me here to spit a thesis against both of yo asses
Let me start with you there, Frankenstein
Looking like something out of R.L. Stine
It's hip-hop chowder, red over white
This is all why tzar's wife can't do shit tonight
And Joseph, you were supposed to be my right-hand man
But your loyalty shriveled up like your right hand, man!
My whole future was bright, you let your heart grow dark
And stopped the greatest revolution since the birth of Marx!

Knock knock knock knock
Did somebody say birth marks?
Yo, I'm the host with the most glasnost
Assholes made a mess and the war got cold
Shook hands with both Ronald's, Reagan and McDonalds, no doubt.
If your name ends with "in", time to get out!
I have the balls to let Barynshnikov dance playa!
Tore down that wall like the Kool-Aid Man, oh yeah!
You two need yoga, you need to shower
And you all need to learn how to handle real power!

Did somebody say real power?
Дa, you want to mess with me
I spit hot borsch when I'm crushing these beats
Blow it up like a tuba, while I'm balling in Cuba
Doing judo moves and schooling every Communist сука
I'm a president in my prime, my enemies don't distract me
The last man who attacked me lived a half-life so comrade, come at me
You don't know what you're doing, what, are you trying to bust a rhyme against a mind like Putin!
You'll find that the ex-KGB is the best MC in the ex-CCCP!

Lyrics was added by brawlman297

Lyrics was corrected by Odbornik1

Video was added by MrsLovett

Season 2

Epic Rap Battles Of History lyrics